Yeah...it's alright - Disney

You know it's a funny thing but you can always taste quality. For me it's like Cadbury chocolate; nothing else quite tastes like it. This isn't just a plug for Cadbury chocolate although it is worth mentioning that it is my favorite brand. Some people might try to convince me that there are better chocolates, chocolates for the more refined palate but I still go back to my beloved Cadbury every time. It's a dear name and with it there comes a certain uniqueness. I might eat some store brand chocolate and it'll taste nice enough. It's good chocolate but it isn't Cadbury and that's the point of today's rant/opinion/view/crazy proselytizing. Disney movies, and particularly Disney animations, have a certain quality that need to be upheld. 

I had a dream when I was younger; to become a Disney animator. Now I know nothing of the animation process on that scale but I was young and naïve and actually had a reasonable talent for drawing so I had that going for me. I sat and practiced my art trying to nail the different styles of animation. The Simpsons unique style and, more importantly for me, the style of Disney. I remember gushing with self pride when I finally nailed the Disney technique of the duck's bill and those eggshaped eyes. Soon more skills followed and with each passing year new hope came. I saw Beauty and the Beast (my all time favorite by the way), Little Mermaid, Aladdin, The Lion King, Pocahontas, and all the movies of the “Golden Age” come out and each renewed my hope. And then, one day, a dagger was plunged into my heart; Toy Story. 

This was something I'd never seen before, a style of animation completely new to me. Foreign, cold, and unfamiliar (Are you a secret cartoon racist? - Ed.). But it was fine. It wasn't all singing all dancing but it was entertaining enough, in fact very entertaining. Still, despite what it said on the posters at the theater, it wasn't Disney though. Disney movies were animated in a more traditional style, they had big song numbers and were major events. Often it would be the case that we wouldn't see a Disney movie in the theater but actually wait six months for the VHS to come out. They were huge. And here was this movie which, despite it's ground breaking new techniques, seemed very small. It's fine I thought, just a glitch like when your favorite rock band releases a lot of poorly chosen electro disco tracks – I'm looking at you Queen, and thankfully more traditional Disney movies returned (Mulan, Hercules, e.t.c. - Oh by the way, I make no claim that any of this is chronological it's just what my eleven year old self is remembering.) 

Shrek, Monsters Inc., Shrek 2, Finding Nemo, Toy Story 2, 'Finding Shrek Inc.', Toy Story 3: Attack of the Killer Cars. These are all good movies but they lack that key quality of the show. The Disney formula is simple: Take one traditional folk story/pseudo-historical event; add an Alan Menken musical score; a dash of Disney magic and leave to simmer in the hearts and minds of adults and children alike. The Rescuers was amazing by the way – I preferred The Rescuers 2. 

Now for anybody from Disney who might be reading: stop with the pop culture references. They age incredibly badly. Your movies used to have funny moments without having ghetto speak or characters which are outrageous. Also stop with the freaking stupid cuts. You're not making a Scooby Doo cartoon from the 70s. The cast breaking out into song shouldn't be so damned staged. And lastly, GAAAAH! 

Lance “Drawn-with-natural-outline-colors” Pawman

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